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1.
Aftermath 04:15
lyrics
As I looked outside this morning I noticed there was life A bird called its warning & the dew left by the night The people who were together were all singing a song A song of love & unity, won’t you come & sing along Trees sprouting from the ground all, covered with leaves As I breathed out innocence, that brought forth disease And all those happy faces, turned into frowns Like a whole wild world was shook & turned upside down You never know what'll happen when you discover love You know you’ve found the right one, when a light shines high above Trees sprouting from the ground, all covered with leaves As I breathed out innocence that, brought forth disease But if you’ve chosen the wrong path And the road’s nowhere to be found Get ready for an aftermath that will only bring you down As I looked outside this morning I noticed there was life A bird called its warning & the dew left by the night The people who were together were all singing a song A song of love & unity won’t you come & sing along
2.
Double-Edge 03:00
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If life was a facade And everyone’s a fraud Could a heart that’s ripped from within ever mend? There’s no person in this world Nor little boy or girl I’d ever expect to comprehend Da da da da da da da da da da Da da da da da da da da When truth is all I seek And the dead who cannot speak The ones to ask will only tell me lies The ones to ask will only tell me lies So if I seem distraught They’ll tell you that I am not They’ve said so for all of their lives They’ve said so for all of their lives When there is no other way And the words get hard to say When the thoughts begin to overwhelm And the only thing I trust Is when I turn to dust I’ll find it in another realm I’ll find it in another realm To find it in another realm
3.
Why Death Came 05:06
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Walking through the shadows Every day of the week I just want someone to talk to But I’m too shy to speak I saw you hurry by me Important things on your mind If you look you cannot find me Here I am among my kind Could you ever notice me? Or give the time of day Will you ever know my pain? Such a shame to say is why death came Voices in the darkness Tell me that I must follow To where a light is shining All the way through the Hollow In the mist I see a home for me Soaked with rains of days gone by Just a part of the scenery is What I’ll become when I die Just for once will you notice me? Here I am lost in the weeds All my life I’ve been tossed aside Tragically that day my death came I hear whispering I don’t know why Is anyone listening? Because I see them pass me by
4.
Little Billy (In memory of William Carroll Jr.) 03:02
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Hey little Billy Oh where have you been? No it isn’t silly This dream that we’re here Oh little Billy Now where did you go? Out into this city He’s someone you could know He was so young His time had just begun A fate he can’t outrun How could anyone ever judge you? Poor little Billy His life was tough Out of the city Looking down from high above These streets ain’t pretty But your smile was loved Oh little Billy You never lived enough Poor little Billy You never lived enough
5.
Mannequin 02:58
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I’m sitting here, watching you go by Children stand in fear, & wonder if I’m alive You shed a tear, if only I could cry When you disappear, & I’ll still be here. What I’d give to be you What I’d give to be anyone What I’d give to see sunshine Not be just a mannequin. How long can it be for you to come see me? I’ll wait for you; it’s all that I can do Stare into the eyes, beauty can hypnotize And all I can do is dream for you to come see me. What I’d give to be you What I’d give to be anyone What I’d give to see sunshine Not be just a mannequin, not be just a mannequin
6.
I Waited 03:17
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Been a long time, since I seen your face Can’t remember when, but I’ll know the place Painted a picture in my mind And when I got there, she waited this time She waited for me, is this a sign She waited like everything was fine. How many days, how many months, how many years go by Is this the way, is this the way that we try I sent a letter to your home I could not go there, all alone I waited for you in the cold I waited ‘til I got too old Anticipating is so degrading And waiting goes without saying I waited too long to be gone She waited ‘til her hair was grey & long I waited too long to be gone She waited ‘til her hair was grey & long
7.
Crossfire 02:44
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I walk these streets a million times And it’s always been an eye for an eye Now for this city I have no desire Walking in the crossfire Day to day I live in danger For I am no stranger In my own land, we all need a helping hand Walking in, walking in the crossfire Caught in the crossfire Guns aiming at me If I die, I just have to wait and see Caught in the crossfire Guns aiming at me If I die, I just to wait & see Inside we all hide our fear We show no emotion Not even a tear, we live in constant danger Reminded of a shot down stranger Walking in, walking in the crossfire Caught in the crossfire Guns aiming at me If I die, I just have to wait & see Caught in the crossfire Guns aiming at me, if I die, I just have to wait & see If I die, I just to wait & see
8.
What You Were Then (old live sounds) 03:09
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We were pristine, we were young & we were free We could be what we wanted to be Then one day, we grew up Then one day, we were out of love Time rattles on leaves you down, leaves you out Time passes by like an eagle in the sky What you were then you’re not now What you were then you’re not now Looking back at some old photographs Reading lines from those few paragraphs Visions of harsh reality Incisions of deep memories What you were then you’re not now What you were then you’re not now We were pristine We were young, we were free We could be what we wanted to be Then one day we grew up And then one day we were out of love What you were then you’re not now What you were then you’re not now
9.
So Alone 03:14
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Oh, so alone Oh, so alone But what can I do, I’m missing you What can I do, I’m needing you Oh, so afraid Oh, so afraid But what can I say; it’s just the way that I chose yesterday Oh oh oh oh oh Oh oh oh oh oh Oh, so ashamed Oh, so ashamed But what can I do I had to move, no one could see what I went through Oh, so alone Oh, so alone But what can I say it’s just my way of letting you go so astray Oh oh oh oh oh Oh oh oh oh oh
10.
Hideaway 03:08
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I know that maybe I’ll be rich some day I’ll be living in my hideaway Looking down on those less fortunate As I write another chapter in my book Until the time I reach that day I’ll be dreaming little dreams of my hideaway Don’t wake me too soon I need a better look As I write another chapter in my book Hideaway, I can’t stay long, got to get right back where I belong Don’t look upon me like I need more sleep I’m just thinking of a place I’d rather be I know that maybe I’ll be rich some day I’ll be living in my hideaway And looking down on those less fortunate As I write another chapter in my book I’m not just a dreamer; I’m not just a fool I’ve been through all that, I’ve been to school You can’t knock someone with a hope for success It’s one of those things that I love best Hideaway, I can’t wait long Until the day I’m where I belong If I play all my cards right I’ll be looking at you in real life
11.
Nightmares 04:07
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In the early morning My hands are scarred & bruised Always been that way It’s why I’m so confused There were holes in the wall Just above my weary head What I learned from it all Was never really said Nightmares and terror Will haunt my dreams tonight As I try to escape The dark and dangerous night It’s these horrors that I fear Do I lean toward the light? I don’t know how many years I’ve been running for my life In these secrets that I keep The one’s I’d never tell Cause when I fall asleep My dream's a living hell Nightmares and terror In all my dreams tonight As I try to escape The dark and dangerous night When the wind begins to blow I’ll freeze in angst despair My blood will cease to flow Is anyone really there? In these Nightmares and terror That haunt my dreams tonight Will I try to escape This dark & dangerous night
12.
Man of Mediocrity 03:35
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All the freaks on the downtown streets with their hand out All wanting something for nothing you don’t have What do they expect when you shake your head & say sorry I’ve given enough, though the times are tough don’t lay your guilt on me, and I’m…. Not a rich man, I’m not a door man at Sally-Ann Not a beggar, not a martyr, just a man, of mediocrity All the men with their shirts tucked in & their brief case All sulking around when the stocks are down, their like disease Giving evil eyes to the passer’ byes soothes their needs Back up again to the office den for a line of C, & I’m… Not a rich man, just a poor man of misery Not a bad man, not a saint, just the man I thought I’d be Not a low life, not a high life… Mediocrity All the creeps on the downtown streets with their hand out All wanting something for nothing you don’t have What do they expect when you shake your head & say sorry I’ve given enough, though the times are tough just don’t bother me, cause I’m…. Mediocrity

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released May 22, 2016

All songs, lyrics & music by Dennis Patrick McDonald

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The Soakes Lonesome image

The Soakes Lonesome Richmond Hill, Ontario

I am a survivor of childhood physical, emotional and sexual abuse.

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