1. |
One Way Street
03:21
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I’m afraid if I close my eyes
I’ll go to sleep
I might miss out on things
God I’m in too deep, it’s a one way street
And as the light goes on
Time to say good-bye
I can’t keep my eyes open
No matter how hard I try, a sin that I deny
I dug this hole that I’m standing in
I dug for years, is that how long it’s been?
I left it all, to my next of kin
I got to get out, because they’re all getting in, I just can’t win
Another day and I see the sun
Shining down so bright
Last night after all that fun
Kept me up all night, something’s just not right
I’m beginning to understand
It’s right before my eyes
But then on the other hand
It’s all a rented disguise, right before your eyes
I dug this hole that I’m standing in
I dug for years, is that how long it’s been?
I left it all to my next of kin
I got to get out because they’re all getting in, I just can’t win
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2. |
Co-Dependent
04:18
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What is your crutch, was is your security
Worry too much, suffer from inferiority
What do you use to get through the high traumatic day?
What do you use to improve, your sly pathetic way?
Getting through the day, Getting through the day
Getting through the only way I know
Getting through the day.
With a smile on my face & an empty jar
Things don’t seem so bad
At a snails pace, through a crowded bar
Things don’t seem so bad
Getting through the day, Getting through the day
Getting through the only way I know
Getting through the day.
Co-Dependents know, only high is low
Spread it thin and savor it.
Co-Dependents fear, closing time is near
Pop’em in & off they go
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3. |
Baseball Bat
03:37
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It blows my mind every time I hear these fools
Bragging about what their going to do
The kingpin tsars in their speedy cars
Dragging out to all those alternative bars
The business men in their monkey suits
Reminds me of a circus all freaks & recruits
I’m sick & tired of all they are
And what they stand for won’t go very far
When do they realize, where reality’s at
I could make more friends with a baseball bat
Politicians with hopes and dreams
On the outside they’re smiling, on the inside they’re fiends
All the hopefuls with their equal rights
Couldn’t get too far in a real fight
And the drag queens feel that their all old maids
‘Cause their boyfriends they all gone straight
I’m sick & tired of all they are
And what they stand for won’t go very far
When do they realize where reality’s at?
I could make more friends with a baseball bat
I could make more friends with a baseball bat
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4. |
Eyestone
03:37
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Curtis C. Eyestone was a bitter man
He could sit & watch his life sift through his hands
When his working days done, let him have his fun
If that’s all he’s got I’d feel sorry for his son.
He's one vile and lonely man
No one could ever understand
He's going to lie to make it all his own
People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.
Curtis C. Eyestone was a jealous man
All the work that’s been done was a credit to his land
Looking through your painted glass at the peons down below
How many more rocks do you have to throw?
He's one vile and lonely man
No one could ever understand
He's going to lie & make it all his own
People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones
People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones
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5. |
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What you see is all you get
I can’t stand on my head
If I’m not all that you expect
I can’t call you my friend.
I’m no more than an average man
I sure ain’t no superman
I’d give all I got
In my hands, to be an icon, not a lamb
I got hopes, I got plans,
I got traits I can’t stand
I got dreams, I got sorrow
I got a body I can borrow.
I got a maybe here in my pocket
I don’t really talk about it.
What you see is all you get
I can’t stand on my head
If I’m not all you expect
I can’t call you my friend
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6. |
Hard To Say Goodbye
03:00
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It’s hard to say good-bye to a friend
When you know that it’s really not the end
We’ll see each other again
I know where but I don’t know when
Lord it’s hard to say good-bye to a friend
Our meeting wasn’t just coincidence
What we talked about made good sense
You were always kind to me
And I’d admired your bravery
Lord it’s hard to say good-bye to a friend
Now you don’t have to fight it anymore
You can throw that damn disease right through the door
There’ll be no more “knockin’ out”
We got better things to sing about
Lord it’s hard to say good-bye to a friend
When you know that it’s really not the end
We’ll see each other again
I know where but I don’t know when
Lord it’s hard to say good-bye to a friend
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7. |
My Misery
03:40
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A sad little lad crawled into his bed
And prayed he’d never wake up
When the worst he feared was true
His anger grew and grew
To the point where he’d give up
From the aching of his heart
To a life that fell apart
Any love he knew was wrong
All this being said, it filled his veins with dread
He suffered for far too long
Though others may have it worse
He’d curse & curse & curse
He could not move, scream or cry ~
That shadow of the dark was not the only part
Of why he wanted to die
The burning of the skin, as leather thrashes in
A fist, a boot, or wooden spoon~
This may be the night that will end my life
So please Death take me soon
(Solo)
So now where do I go? The devil’s on patrol
I can’t retrieve what was lost inside of me
I can paint some walls in blood, it’ll never be enough
To soothe my pain & misery
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8. |
From Grace To Hollywood
03:23
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If I could, I think I could, I could fall from grace to Hollywood
The stars in bars, stealing cars, reflecting that last scene on Mars
From the top of the hill to the bottomless pit
From a child protégé to a stiff on the skids
Last bum in the line working part time
Too close to the edge, too wasted to climb.
Out of the past, had to laugh
Some old buff asked for your autograph
It’s time to plead, remember me
I'm not asking for that million dollar lead
From the top of the hill to the bottomless pit
From a child protégée to a stiff on the skids
Last bum in the line, working part time
Too close to the edge, too wasted to climb.
If I could, I think I could, I could fall from grace to Hollywood
Grace to Hollywood, grace to Hollywood
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9. |
If I Should Die
03:21
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Alone, afraid, sick of life & what I’ve made of it
Just want to quit, oh what’s the use in crying, it’s all so
defining.
If I should die tonight, please try and understand
If I should die tonight, in my mind I know I’m right
I’ve done so much thinking that’s all I ever do
You know what wasting time, can put you through
If I should die tonight, please try and understand
If I should die tonight, my presence here is not a life
Alone, afraid, sick of life & the choices I’ve made it’s true
I’ve thought it through, as some do, start all over again
And be someone new, like some do
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10. |
Happy Thoughts
03:31
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You were in a forest picking flowers
Counting every tree you saw
Memories of the spring time’s early showers
Walking in the thick October fog
Think happy thoughts
But don’t depend on those dreams
Or the dark
You were in a field of head high towers
Hiding as friends looked behind logs
Summer scents so sweet so sour
For the first time your caught
Think happy thoughts
But don’t depend on those dreams
Or the dark
A childhood friend, a bump on the head
A day in the sun and a clown on the run
A walk by the sea, a warm summer breeze
A fireside talk, think happy thoughts
Think happy thoughts
But don’t depend on those dreams
Or the dark
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11. |
The Song
02:54
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Millions of songs
Some may sound the same though
Each had meaning in its day
Millions of songs
Play on the radio
Some last forever some don’t
Millions of Words are
Contemplated for ages
Written on the lines of the page
Millions of eyes are
Looking high up to see
The source of the song
Millions of hearts are
Touched by the beauty of the song
Feeling the will to carry on
Millions of songs
Some may sound the same though
Each has meaning in its day; each has meaning in its day
Each has meaning in its day
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12. |
It's The End
02:49
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Hey you, where would you go, if the oceans overflowed
And the sun began to dim, just as the waves came crashing in
Is it a dream? Is it a scheme? Is the world really going to end?
Maybe a freeze or a disease
A germ dropped through the breeze
A soldier less war a hole in the floor
An evil rotted to the core
It’ the end, It’s the end
It’s the end, the real end
Runaway trains, vanishing planes
Arid deserts plagued with rain
A cloud from the east a heat that won’t cease
The biochip mark of the beast
Is it a dream? Is it a scheme? Is the world really going to end?
Is it all fear that we all hear
Maybe the end is not so near
It’s not only me, who don’t believe
Selling you out from under your feet
And they'll deceive you until you can’t breathe
There’ll be no one here left to grieve
It’s the end, it’s the end
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The Soakes Lonesome Richmond Hill, Ontario
I am a survivor of childhood physical, emotional and sexual abuse.
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